RIYADH, Saudi Arabia — President Donald Trump has blamed his awkward dance moves in Saudi Arabia on an Adventist dance instructor.
The Commander-in-Chief was filmed taking part in a traditional Saudi Dance on his visit to the country.
Asked why his moves were so lacking in rhythm and fluidity, Trump placed the blame on a “truly terrible Adventist dance instructor that Ben Carson recommended to me as I was prepping for the Inaugural Ball.”
The instructor had allegedly convinced Trump that Pathfinder marching steps were a perfectly acceptable form of dancing and that they carried the added benefit of coming across as kosher in any culture.
The president said that he had already fired the instructor but that “with everything that’s been going on I’ve been too busy for any other dance classes.”
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Strangely enough, President Ted Wilson used the services of the same dance instructor, and he is even worse than Trump–even though Wilson grew up in the Egypt and should be familiar with the native cultural dances. I am leaving early from Wilson’s Middle East trip, as I can’t take the embarrassment. Wilson even refused to touch the Saudi’s ceremonial sword, insisting instead on holding “the Sword of the Spirit,” his well-worn Bible. I told him over and over, “Ted, when in Saudi Arabia, do as the Saudis do.” In one ear, and out the other. No wonder we don’t see eye to eye on a few issues–especially women’s ordination. . . .
Trump should consult Dougie on how to do back flips. Jumping through hoops is another worthwhile activity for our glorious President.
He should also take skateboarding lessons from pastor David Ashcherick and basketball lessons from my friend Dennis Rodman.
Did Dr. Ben Carson have the same instructor? He and Trump were filmed dancing while a soloist crooned a pro-Trump song during the campaign, and it looked like they were making the same equally poor dance moves.
I grew up as an Adventist kid and Adventists don’t dance. I a,aged that there is one.. Very funny!
BREAKING NEWS – Dougie Batchelor Flips Out
Today Dougie Batchelor issued a dire warning of a “critical threat” to democracy, accusing the President of bowing to the Beast and ushering in the International Sunday Law. His tirade came as Trump had a 30-minute meeting with the Pope in his study at the Holy See. “See, I told you so,” said Batchelor. “If you look real hard, you will see ‘666’ on Trump’s forehead.” Then, in exasperation, Batchelor flipped out–literally–by performing a world-record sequence of his signature back flips, a feat he mastered while dwelling in a cave in his younger years.