La Sierra Religion Professor Blasts Santa as “Works-Obsessed Gifter”

RIVERSIDE, Calif. — A La Sierra University religion professor has denounced Santa Clause as a complete legalist after reviewing the North Pole resident’s criteria for giving gifts. Dr. Sola Read more […]

Adventists banned from telling kids about Santa because he “levitates”

SILVER SPRING, Md. — A Christmas Day email blast from the General Conference headquarters of the Adventist Church has instructed world divisions to demand that members refrain from telling their Read more […]

Seventh-day Adventist Church endorses “perfectly-numbered” iPhone 7

SILVER SPRING, Md. — In the first Apple product endorsement in Seventh-day Adventist history, church leaders released a statement today extolling the virtues of the “perfectly numbered” iPhone Read more […]

Adventist Risk Management hawks Home Alone booby traps as Time of Trouble protection

SILVER SPRING, Md. — Adventist Risk Management has launched a major advertising campaign to drive sales of what a press release calls “Home Alone-style booby traps to enhance the safety of Adventists Read more […]