GC Christmas Decorations Consist Entirely Of Red Tape




SILVER SPRING, Md. — The General Conference building has joined the festive season by decorating each floor with an impressive amount of red tape.

Feeling the tithe parity squeeze, the treasury department banned the use of any other material for dressing up office spaces. But since there was no end to the supply of red tape in the building, departments were told they could go to town.

Mired in insane amounts of bureaucracy, the third floor is easily the most festive this year. A few pragmatists wandering the halls have been overheard muttering “bah humbug” as they wade through the decorations.┬áNot a single thing has been accomplished on the floor all month due to all the tape.


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  1. Richard Mills

    I am having a blue Christmas. By the way, isn’t Santa always dressed in red? The Devil in Deviled Ham is red? Rudolph the Red-nosed reindeer? I once bought red roses for a blue lady. Prada shoes are red. Dorothy wore red shoes. What’s with this obsession with red? OOPS-red is in the Bible!! M.A.G.A==. Make Adventism Great Again. Let’s hear it for the 2020 GC session!!

  2. Hartmut W Sager

    > M.A.G.A. = Make Adventism Great Again

    Can’t happen until the departure (or impeachment) of Pope Wilson II.

    > Not a single thing has been accomplished on the floor all month due to all the tape.

    How is that different from any other month?

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