COLLEGEDALE, Tenn. — Junior Theology major Nedlan Flanners was seen earlier today somberly marching in circles around an utterly confused girl on the campus of Southern Adventist University.
Although he had never spoken to Ella Thatcher, Flanners explained to reporters that he had gained inspiration from his morning devotions to march around his crush seven times before “letting out a mighty cry and hoping for the best.”
Flanners had shared his “Jericho Strategy” plans with some of his Old Testament Studies classmates earlier today.
He told friends he was confident that his plan would result in Thatcher “letting down her defenses” and perhaps even agreeing to a library date.
Thatcher was last seen dropping all her books before sprinting across campus.
Single, separated, divorced and widowed Adventists who want to change that status wanted.
THE ISRAELITE ARMY MARCHED AROUND JERICHO AND AT LEAST ONE OF THOSE DAYS WAS THE SABBATH.
This Flanners guy is a total jerk. He should be marching around his theological assignments 7 x 7! What’s Ella to do? Walk away seven times as far. Stick to the book larnin’, Flanners. Love will come soon enough! Woe iz me!
I think its a rather sweet idea. But one of two things will happen most likely. Either she will feel realm awkward around him from now on and will shut off any relationship him, or she will feel awkward, but he’s got her attention now… Anything could happen, but it is kind of awkward either way…
Actually, I tried the same ploy back in the 70s, on the same campus as it happens. In the middle of my third circuit, the girl in question put her arm out to stop me and asked me, what the hell are you doing? That somehow ruined the atmosphere of the attempt, and I went back to the usual method, stalking her between classes…