SAN ANTONIO, Texas — A team of National Geographic reporters has declared San Antonio a Blue Zone as scores of centenarians have descended upon the city for the Seventh-day Adventist Church’s July 2-11 General Conference Session.
The term Blue Zone is used to denote a group of people or an area of the world where people live measurably longer lives. “Up until now we had only identified five blue zones around the world,” said lead National Geographic investigator Lon Jevitee, “then all these Adventist hundred-somethings started arriving in San Antonio.”
San Antonio tourism officials alerted Jevitee to the invasion of San Antonio by scores of extremely old Adventists and asked for Blue Zone recognition for the city. “I wasn’t about to just dole out Blue Zone cred willy-nilly,” said Jevitee, who immediately flew out with a team to investigate.
Jevitee’s investigative team was not disappointed as they interviewed scores of walker-pushing Adventist centenarians while they registered for the General Conference meetings this morning.
“They are a very different breed,” said Jevitee, who agreed to add San Antonio to National Geographic’s featured list of Blue Zones. “Most of the Adventist centenarians we talked to today have never had a cheeseburger and none of them are complaining that their church has shut down all of the Alamodome Starbucks joints.”
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