It’s Official: State of the Dead Doctrine Total Bummer

Dust to dust.

WORLDWIDE – One clear conclusion can be drawn from Pew Research Center data ranking Adventist fundamental beliefs in order of their approval rating with the general public: the State of the Dead doctrine is an absolute party pooper.

Researchers found that respondents almost all described the belief that loved ones were not playing harps in heaven or helping their poker game, as “a total bummer.”

Lead researcher Memento Mori said the Adventist tendency to insist loved ones are asleep rather than in a better place, rubs people the wrong way.

“Many respondents said they have taken to not inviting Adventist relatives to funerals,” reported Mori.


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One comment

  1. Hartmut W Sager

    Things were getting quite lame on RarelyAdventist, but you sure managed to wake up the dead with this one! (Oops, I’m still waiting for the expected torrent of comments.)

    There’s actually a lot of truth in this one. I’ve seen it in my own Adventist circles, with non-original Adventists, who quickly switch to “alive in Heaven and looking down upon us” when one of their most loved ones dies.

    “….. not inviting Adventist relatives to funerals,” is also actually true, out of fear that those Adventist relatives will balk (instead of remaining respectfully quiet) at the standard things said at Evangelical, Protestant, and Catholic funerals.

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