SILVER SPRING, Md. — For a limited time only, inflatable Nebuchadnezzar statues are on sale at the General Conference bookstore for an exclusive baptized member price of $144.
Although store managers claimed not to know the day or the hour the sale would end, they told eager Adventist customers that the sale would be over in the blink of an eye.
“If your local church doesn’t yet have an inflatable graven image to attract traffic during your prophecy campaigns, now is your chance,” said GC Director of Prophecy Swag Pat Moss.
“There is nothing more inviting to the outside public than a scantily-glad, easily-inflatable Babylonian king statue swaying gently in the breeze in your church parking lot.”
Moss issued a word of caution to churches wishing to purchase their graven images.
“Don’t leave them standing overnight,” said Moss. “These things have a history of being decimated by rolling rocks.”
Do the statues come with ten individual toes?
Another silly and fake fiction.
Sorry i cant agree with this. It does Christ no service it mocks Gods last day movment while spreading lies ,rumers and gossib. This is mocking God
Amen! For too long this site has been allowed to mock SDA with so-called humor. It only makes us look like a cult, and it deceives people from other denominations who may not realize it is allegedly so-called “satire.”
Are these statues fireproof?
BTW, the marketer should be made aware: if this item is not available on Amazon the effort will be crushed.
My marketing company will make 12disciples ,12 tribes, the Sanctuary, the last supper, Daniel&Revealation beasts, EGW,,etc. call me…18001844 ext. 1844.
Can you please contact me.
I would like to know more about this items for my church.
do you have pictures?
I would like to know the sizes of these items