‘Crazy Rich Asians’ Sequel Set on Luxurious Campus of the SDA Southern Asia-Pacific Division

Aesthetic Perfection...
Aesthetic Perfection…

CAVITE, Philippines — As the long-awaited romantic comedy, Crazy Rich Asians, wows audiences around the world with its stunning portrayal of Singapore’s hot spots, studio executives have already decided on the principal shooting location for the film’s sequel. The next film will be set on the campus of the Adventist denomination’s Southern Asia-Pacific Division (SSD.)

“We’ve criss-crossed the region and are convinced that the oppulence on display on this campus qualifies it perfectly as the setting for the Crazy Rich Asians sequel,” said a Warner Brothers statement announcing the movie. “The upcoming film will show even more of the lush extravagance that can be found in Southeast Asian high society enclaves.”

The statement ended by openly wondering where a church could get the money to “build a slice of heavenly splendor on earth.”

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  1. richeerich

    My sources tell me, “Wait until the 2020 GC. Asians are gonna take over the whole GC. Gonna clean the swamp in Silver Springs. Really BIG clean up. Tofu on the GC menu all the time. Free fortune cookies served daily. Already, rich SDA Asians are buying up surrounding property on Rt. 29. Rice paddies in every SDA church. Even the Little Debbies will have an Asian touch.” Sayanara everybody

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