ADVENTIST WORLD – A diagnosed Badventist rushed to complete the finishing touches on the construction of a hidden pantry this Friday afternoon.
Anxious to get the job done before sunset, Mocco Lateigh hastily installed the least conspicuous door he had been able to find at Home Depot.
Mocco and his wife Ventty proceeded to stock the hidden pantry with their extensive supply of coffee products before locking the door.
In preparation for the Sabbath hours and ahead of the vespers crowd from church that would be arriving for dinner, the Lateigh’s hung an over-sized sunset calendar over the pantry door.
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That’s rather mild. Plenty of Adventist from the islands have pantries stocked with spirits. No joke. When around other SDAs, they claim that it’s used only for baking cakes (where most of it allegedly evaporates) or for curing colds or insomnia. But behind closed doors, they indulge while playing dominoes etc. Maybe everybody has a vice, but either you believe in drinking or you don’t. If you do believe in it, drink proudly and openly — not behind hidden pantry doors.
This is true. I have personally seen the kitchens of even the most devout SDAs from the islands, which are full of rum bottles, some full and some partly empty. To drink, or not to drink? That is the question.
“Everyone has a twin.” I saw mine in the cage at the zoo.
Hey, Mon-Erryting awright. Make no fun of us islanders. There can be other stuff in this hidden closet like SOP books, cans of vega meat, bling & makeup to wear after Sabbath, special worldy clothes, unpaid tithe(in case of emergencies). Don’t forget those unique relatives! I think that’s all that is in my closet. Please forgive me for being so up front!