
LONDON, England — The Seventh-day Adventist Church has set a fresh Guinness World Record for Most Confusing Illustration. Guinness spokesperson Naka Lilito said that the organization’s judges took one look at the Seventh-day Adventist prophetic chart and issued the record title to the denomination.
Lilito said that the judges were so impressed with the graphic that they asked to inspect the church’s archive of Daniel and Revelation artwork.
Insiders say that the artwork is inspiring entire new record categories. Judges are allegedly contemplating awarding the denomination record titles in hieroglyphics and “virtually indecipherable code.”
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Amen.
Amen to your “amen.”
IN MANY MUSLIM COUNTRIES, THEY HAVE A HARD TIME READING ROAD SIGNS, SO THEY OPT TO HAVE NONE.
Finally! Someone understands these pictures. Or at least their value. Renaming the church is in order now: C*SDA! (Confusion* Seventh-day Adventist). The asterisk with note underneath would explain why that is prize-winning positive! And the three angels could carry celestial asterisks imprinted on their wings.
This is not news. They’ve had the asterisk on their wings for centuries. You’ve just been too busy reading BarelyAdventist, to notice.
The church should also get the award for the “most confusing relationship between Little Debbie’s snack cakes and the health message.”
Yeah, I’m still trying to figure out that one. . . . What really makes it confusing is the fact that Loma Linda medical school offers an elective course in “Treating Little Debbies addiction” and a required course in “Diagnosis and Treatment of Little Debbie-induced Diabetes, Obesity, and Vascular Disease.” Hmm. . . .
It’s not my product which is bad, its the abusive, overeating, pig like behavior. Just like one glass of wine with your dinner does not make you a drunkard.
Man up!!
Wasn’t the pictured chart actually crated by William Miller, long before the Seventh-day Adventist Church ever existed?
He “crated” it? He put it in a crate? Time to take Typing 101 or Typing for Dummies.
No, the chart really was crated then shipped to the twilight zone and sent back with full approval. The crazy part is the earnest belief in it even now.
When people first consider joining a cult, they are treated positively, showered with attention, and are invited to take part in social activities with the group and its leader. Compliance at this stage can be a result of social pressure, but may also come as a result of politeness, or out of curiosity.
Once these positive experiences entice new recruits to stay, older members begin to treat them critically, isolating them and forcing them to take part in lectures about the fundamental beliefs of the group. The cult diminishes the recruit’s sense of self and her ability to make good decisions, so compliance results from an effort to reduce these negative aspects of group membership.
Eventually, the recruits will experience “identification,” where they will comply with the group and its leader because they want to please them, and often because they would like to imitate them. The level of compliance is gradually increased, until the recruits are made to comply with extreme demands.
Cult members eventually begin to adopt the beliefs and values of the group as their own, and will openly make sacrifices for the group. At this point, recruits have become devoted members at the “internalization” stage, which goes together with “consolidation” where allegiance to the group is solidified with total acceptance of all aspects of the cult.
Sorry, did not read it all. Too long for this type of site. Also what the Hades are you talking about?
That’s how it worked when I joined a UFO cult. The little green aliens were nice to me at first, then they shamed me and indoctrinated me until I believed them hook, line, and sinker. Then I sank into their dogma and drank their Kool-Aid until I smelled a rat and Scotty beamed me up.
Well, that explains it all.
All youse Biblical students need to back to Prophecy 101. This chart is not rocket science. Even I understand it! Woe iz me.
Hey Richard, say Hi to the guy in the white coat. Hey, I see one of those dudes comin’ at me right now. Far out, dude, like what’s that straight-jacket thingy he gots there?