LINCOLN, Neb. — In a step sure to revolutionize Adventist college recruiting, Union College announced today that transfer students to the school will be placed in the same class as their camp crush.
“All we need is the name of the Union student you remember from summer camp,” said Enrollment spokesperson Amor Sincero. “We’ll handle all the logistics.”
Sincero said that every effort would be made to ensure that the class in which a transfer student and their camp crush are placed, is small and features circular seating charts that facilitate cheesy grins and blushes.
“We’ll try to make sure that it is a class where the professor keeps asking everyone to pair up and discuss heartfelt things for a really long time,” said Sincero.
She added that the school will offer a scholarship to any transfer student that can score a banquet date with a camp crush by Valentine’s.