WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the impeachment trial gets under way in the Senate, lawmakers have opted to implement a very Adventist protocol to break up longer stretches of the proceedings.
Whenever things get too heavy and/or dry, all present will be invited to stand, stretch and look mildly ridiculous as they copy finger gymnastics moves perfected by Annual Council delegates in nearby Silver Spring.
Lawmakers have also committed to breaking for prayer whenever influential speakers wish to steer proceedings in a particular direction.
Adventist Senate Chaplain Barry Black has been tasked with generating a series of praise choruses that can be sung a capella when votes are being counted.
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My sources in DC tell me that the lawmakers will be encouraged to wear a beard in honor of our past 19th century lawmakers. Makes sense!!